Archive for February, 2010

sleepy bunny

Sleep. My new favorite hobby.

February 28, 2010 at 2:35 pm Leave a comment


I don’t know about you, but sometimes technology just amazes me.  Of course, when it doesn’t work, I want to pull out all my hair. Oh wait, there’s none left 🙂

I submitted my taxes electronically last Saturday.  I have a goal each year to do this around Valentine’s day.  I have no idea why other than one year I did it by then and every year since, this has been my goal.  Get it done and get it over with.  I have been fairly consistent that it is usually the week after. I love that I just logon to Turbotax and they have all my information from prior years.  I also love the e-file process. What amazes me is that I received my state refund already. Today.  A week later. I don’t even understand how that can work so fast.

So I start thinking. Why can’t the Census do something similar? Sometimes, I wonder why we try so hard? Do you know it is built into the Census budget to “remind” a household up to 8 (or maybe it is 6) times to complete it?  Does this border on badgering?  I know the more I get hounded about things, the less I do them.  Or if I do give in, it is half-hearted at best. Is this the way we want people to fill out this survey?  I wonder how technology could really be better for this event?

I love that technology (along with some uber-creative minds) brought us Facebook and Twitter.  Facebook really does keep connections alive and active.  For some people, I feel more connected than ever due to our interactions.  When I am lax, as I  have been lately, I almost feel like I don’t know what is happening with my friends. Yes, we still text, or email, or even talk on those rare occasions when I use that thing called the phone.  But nothing like real-time conversations daily. I love Twitter because I have conversations with people from all over the world. And don’t let anyone tell you can’t have one, because you can. I also get to talk to people I never would have, like my favorite authors and researchers. I love having a conversation with the world and believe me, I do.  Italy to India to Canada to down the street.

I wish there was some technological innovation that could inject me with more energy right now! I missed a girlie day with Nancy yesterday due to fatigue.  It’s hard to manage work and school and then find time for my friends without really wearing myself out.  Maybe I should try biofeedback. Hmm….

February 27, 2010 at 6:04 pm Leave a comment

AMC Best Picture Showcase

Those with AMC Theaters where you live, this may be familiar to you. Here in Omaha, AMC Oakview did this last year where the 5 Oscar nominated movies were shown in one day.  This year they are doing it over 2 Saturdays, shown below.  I thought it a great idea and really enjoyed it last year. I don’t believe I could both Saturdays but wanted to share nonetheless for the movie lovers out there!

Some interesting tidbits: they start you off with free popcorn, so that is nice.  You receive a lanyard so you are recognized and can come and go freely. Which could be nice if you happened to see one of the movies and want to get out for a bite, a nap, some shopping.

Oak View 24

Saturday 2/27
10:30AM: AVATAR (3D)*
1:45PM: Up**
3:45PM: A Serious Man
6:30PM: Precious
8:45PM: District 9

Saturday 3/6
10:30AM: An Education
12:45PM: The Hurt Locker
3:15PM: Up in the Air
6:00PM: The Blind Side
8:30PM: Inglourious Basterds

Program Information
Double the films also means more ways to enjoy the showcase!

Standard Ticketing Options:
– Two-Day Pass – Online: $60
– Two-Day Pass – Box Office: $50
– One-Day Pass (February 27 or March 6) – Online and Box Office: $30

MovieWatcher Ticketing Options:
– Two-Day Pass – Box Office: $40
– One-Day Pass (February 27 or March 6) – Box Office: $25

Outside food and beverage will not be allowed for all events.  But, we’ll take care of you with a Free Large Popcorn and unlimited refills.

February 27, 2010 at 7:17 am Leave a comment

Love in the world

We all get melancholy sometimes. However, there are those that just never seem happy. They are almost hateful of the world and everyone in it.  I sometimes refer to these people as black-hearted because they cannot see the love in the world.

To me, love is the answer for just about every question. It took me a long time to realize this but now that I do, I feel that this has helped me see others with better eyes.  I still don’t always know the questions, but I still think love is the answer.

No, I am not always happy. Yes, I get melancholy sometimes.  Yes, this journey has been emotional for me and sometimes harder for me to manage my reactions as a result. But I also know that this is all normal. I don’t think anyone can be happy all the time.  Nor can the journey always be easy. There comes an appreciation for something if you have to work for it.  I know that obtaining my MBA was an accomplishment I never once believed I could do but once done, was an intensely proud moment for me.  I have amazing nurses and doctors who tell me that my chemo brain (a bit spacey or absentminded) is normal and so is my emotional roller coaster.  It doesn’t always make it easier.

What does make it easier is love.  Tonight,  I went to dinner with Pamela and Valdene. We have such a great time together and tonight was no different. When Pamela and I first walked into Taste, a wonderful man was at the bar who started asking me how I was doing.   He was open, nice, energetic, and gave us both a big hug.  Later, Doc, who had not met us before, shared that he had paid for our dinner, wished us a great night and me a healthy journey back onto I-80.  You see, I have shared this before, but right now folks are on 80 and I am on 680. I will meet you round the other side of the highway soon.  He laughed when I told him that.  You see, there is love in the world and it can be found anywhere.  There is more than enough to share. More than enough to give. And more than enough to receive. To Doc, Valdene and Pamela, thank you! Love, Anissa

February 25, 2010 at 6:45 pm 3 comments

You know you are tired when …

  • snow is in the forecast and you forget to look to see if we got any (did we?)
  • you don’t even check your email
  • you don’t even bother to eat
  • you have a voice mail but never heard the phone ring and it’s right there next to you on the nightstand
  • doing homework seems like something that could wait for tomorrow (oh wait, that is every day!)
  • and the big one, you get up at 4:15pm yesterday and within 15 minutes you are back to sleep.  You get up a bit later at 7 to talk to your dad for a few minutes and then go back to bed only to sleep until 10:30am this morning.

February 22, 2010 at 11:10 am Leave a comment


So, I took a first step toward a dream recently. I have long since harbored the desire to write. It started in 3rd grade. Whenever we finished our work early, we could visit one of the four corners of the room for extra things to do to stay busy. I always went to the creative writing corner. First, the story starters were always the same so for some odd reason, I would write a relatively similar story each time. I was told to be more creative. Hey, you be more creative and throw out some different story starters I thought. Or even better, can I just start on my own, fresh with no story starter. When you are in 3rd grade, questions like these aren’t always met well since you have finished your work early and the teacher really wants to concentrate on those that are still working. I have always finished my work early but that shouldn’t be my problem 🙂

Academic writing in APA English during junior and senior years in high school put me off for a bit and I started to think that maybe it was all just a silly thought once upon a time.  However, I notice that I think of stories all the time, especially when I am in that state between being in bed and falling asleep. This is also when I think about things I need to do, but that is for another time!

I started a blog in 2006 and just didn’t know what to do. I had lost my voice. I started again in 2007 through my company’s site and then it took off from there. I realized that I had things to say about coaching and organizations, but I had a ton to say about life and whatnot. So this one came along in 2007 too.

As a way to test out my courage and see how I would feel being pseudo-published, I compiled all of my blog posts for this site from the start til the first one January of this year. I added some stuff, got an ISBN number and published via I got my finished product today and I must say, the immense feeling of accomplishment of doing something like this is pretty good.  I feel a little like a short story writer as I know that these posts are ones I wrote, that had meaning to me when written and now, and that this is a product of me. It’s pretty cool!  I made some mistakes and learned some lessons, but it is cool to hold this hardback with the layout I selected. I have other ideas of things I want to do but mainly now I want to pull out all those stories and ideas and see where they can take me.  Shoot, sitting for chemo is about a 4 hour process, there’s some time right there 🙂

What dreams do you have that are on the shelf that you can dust off?

February 20, 2010 at 2:23 pm Leave a comment

Round 2 – ding!

So the easy part is done – the actual injection of all the chemo.  I know, it’s hard to believe, but that is true. Now it’s just handling the after effects! I spent the weekend getting caught up on just about everything so that I could get off that hamster wheel. Then, when the naps in the mid-afternoon kick in again, I am prepared.   It’s still weird to see myself in a hat and definitely without one! And odd as this sounds, it is still surreal to see T-cell Lymphoma on my chart and follow-up paperwork.

I’ve had amazing friends and family cheering me on, making me laugh, getting me out and about, and overall, giving me incredible strength.  I can’t say it enough … thank you, thank you, thank you 🙂

I don’t know if you can say this, but hope you can. I have the best jobs in the world.  I am a professor and student.  I would say coach, but right now, I have been preparing for my second level certification, so haven’t been coaching outside of practicums.  So, in essence, still a student.  As a professor, I have met some great students that really challenge me and have enjoyed getting to know.  But I also love developing curriculum and well, reading textbooks.  I know, such a dork.  I have the best group of colleagues to work with and I tell you, if you can laugh, have fun and enjoy going to work, well then you have hit the jackpot.

As for being student, you already know that I am dork and love to read textbooks, so this wasn’t a stretch.  I do love learning about new things and after many doctoral fits and starts, finally found my educational home.  Many of you know about my prior doctoral attempts of starting, take a break, then restarting. I really did think I was just done with school. After reading every book (so it seemed) on leadership in my leisure time then getting a graduate degree in it, I finally realized why I felt so unchallenged before. It was all the same stuff, again, except at a PhD level.  I was tired of rehashing the same theories.  I thought I was unmotivated. I thought I was just bored. Well, some of that was true, but for the wrong reasons I realize now.  I really thought I didn’t want a PhD. But I do. I want to be challenged in new ways and broaden my mind more than I can do on my own.  This really isn’t about letters. Heck, I never use any of them. It’s about those ways of stretching yourself.  Love of learning is my number one VIA Strength and it is me to the core.  UNL, the program, the classes and my advisor have been great in terms of challenge, support, and restoring that learning love within. Plus, I get still get to say Go Big Red!

Yup, life is good.  And as the website says — do what you like, like what you do. I hope you do too!

February 16, 2010 at 5:23 pm 1 comment

A happy life indeed

I was talking to someone a several days ago and was asked “how are you holding up”?

Now, first, I don’t like that question.  Please don’t anyone ask that kind of question of me in those words. It is leading and assumes I am not doing well and I am not ‘holding up’.

So, I answered honestly, “I am doing well actually.  There are good moments and tough ones.  Just like anyone else. I am lucky that I am in a place now where I really am happy with my life and that helps me”.

The response I received, “How can you say you are happy with your life? What is happy about it? You have cancer”.

I was shocked speechless by this response.  Yes, I have cancer.  I don’t know the outcome but as far as I am concerned, it is not a death sentence.  The word scares everyone but we know of so many examples in our own worlds and in the public of persons who have faced far worse diagnoses than myself and are living quite wonderfully full lives.  That too will be me.  I didn’t appreciate my life being twiddled down to one word, as if this the whole of who I am.  I have described this before as a journey, a different one that I may have picked for myself, but one I must travel nonetheless. Last night, I was having dinner with Cathy and I described it a bypass. I can’t go on the interstate of life the easy way, I need to take the bypass but I will be right back on that main highway soon enough.

People who know me in Omaha know the me I have worked hard on rebuilding. The person I see in the mirror who I like and believe in. They do not know the defensive, negative, hot-tempered person I once was. I am sure we can all look back at our youth and now see how immature we were. And I know some of this is the case, but I also know that I was someone I didn’t like even as I was getting close to my 30’s, or as I call them,  the adult years.  Maybe we all look at who we are as we move through life and at certain points, take stock and decide our next path. Maybe we continue as we have been, maybe we take a different fork in the road. I know that in my early 30’s, I no longer wanted to hate myself and sought therapy to help me change my behaviors.  My soul was thirsty and restless and it was my time. And through much learning about myself (though my therapist always said I knew all the things about myself that I didn’t like and was already incredibly reflective), I finally learned better strategies of coping and being through her help. And for anyone who thinks therapy is easy, it isn’t. And for anyone embarrassed for me because I was in therapy, don’t be.  It was a huge act of courage and belief in myself to say that despite my knowledge of who I was, I needed help in making a change.

I’m still not quite there and will always be a work in progress, but I hope you see before you a person who is grounded, happy in life, and someone who doesn’t suck the energy out of the room when I walk in.  And to that person I had that conversation with, I am not defined by any one thing, not even cancer.  If you want to give me a label, I would prefer Learner. Bibliophile. Animal lover. Positivist. Student of life. Graduate student. Professor. Coach. Mentor. Teacher. Mom (yes, to 2 cats). A loud laugher. A dork. A movie fan.  A lover of snow. An 80’s music fan. These are labels I embrace!

February 12, 2010 at 10:07 am 1 comment

Ahh so naive

So, I have done it again. I heard what I was told but just didn’t quite get it. I mean really get it.  I had talked to friends about shopping for wigs and scarves, but still hadn’t done so.  And yes, my hair had been thinning and falling out, but nothing like the way it is now. It was actually unnerving today to see the sheer amount falling out.  I know, my oncologist told me to prepare because this was going to happen. Ahh, how naive to believe it wouldn’t … so shopping I shall go!

February 8, 2010 at 9:00 pm Leave a comment

Two traveling angels

This was shared with me via email by Michelle and it certainly spoke to me.  I tried to find an author but it appears to be unknown.  I hope you enjoy as much as I did.

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family..

The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion’s guest room. Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement…

As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it.

When the younger angel asked why, the older angel  replied, ‘Things aren’t always what they seem.’

The next night the pair came to rest at the house  of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his  wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could  have a good night’s rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels  found the farmer and his wife in tears.

Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole  income, lay dead in the field.

The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen? The first man had everything, yet you helped him,  she accused. The second family had little but was willing to  share everything, and you let the cow die.

‘Things aren’t always what they seem,’ the older  angel replied..
‘When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the  wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and  unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the
wall so he wouldn’t find it.’  ‘Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed,  the angel of death came for his wife. I gave him the cow instead.

Things aren’t always what they seem…’

Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things   don’t turn out the way they should.. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You just might not  know it until sometime later….

February 8, 2010 at 6:05 am 2 comments

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February 2010