April 7, 2010 at 9:58 am Leave a comment

I think waiting is tough.  I have never been the most patient at all. I have gotten better about this because I realize that I can’t control everything (so wish I could sometimes!) and needed to let go.

It has been almost 2 weeks since my last oncology appointment because it is now time to see a radiation oncologist. That appointment is tomorrow.  I was told to expect daily radiation for a month.  No one can yet tell me how they will know the cancer is gone or how to fully know it will come back. I hate this.

I think medical waiting is even harder sometimes. It is very much out of your control and sometimes hearing news can be heartbreaking. My gosh, I could not even imagine what this would be like as a parent if it was your child. I was watching Gene Simmons Family Jewels the other day and the title of the show was “waiting is the hardest part”. This intrigued me so I watched it.  I know, it is a reality show. But for a big rock star, the Demon, his life with family can be surprisingly down to earth.  Between this and Dancing with the Stars on occasion, I am not the biggest fan of reality tv.  No thank you, I can look to my own life for that! So back to the show.  Gene’s unwife (they’ve been together 26 years but never married), Shannon, had to get a biopsy for possible breast cancer.  Gene was off for some concerts but kept traveling back between shows to share time with her and to meet her for the doctor’s appointment that would determine her immediate fate.  During that time, family treated her a little differently. More caring, more attentive, more attention.  But it didn’t alleviate the burden of waiting. You could see it on her face.  I like that admitted that she can be stoic and believe she can handle anything but you could also see the absolute relief that Gene was there with her to hear the news, regardless of what it would be.  She later learned that she did not have breast cancer which is certainly a wonderful thing. But that never makes the waiting easier.

Martina Navratilova recently shared that she is going to be undergoing radiation for breast cancer but it was caught early. I think we are seeing more and more incidents of cancer being something that is treatable and not something that is to be whispered about because it is no longer that dirty little word that is equivalent to death. But for any person with cancer, even in remission, there is still some aspect of waiting. Each year, there are checkups. Is it back? Am I still in remission? Will I always be in remission? I hate waiting.


Entry filed under: Miscellania, Relationships, thoughts, well-being. Tags: , , .

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April 2010
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