It’s a 2X2 world

This post has been bouncing around in my head for some time now and think it’s more appropriate than ever.

We live in a 2×2 world.  It seems like everything is set up for couples (and by extension, families).  Shoot, what’s the point of a booth if not to look longingly at your significant other across the table? I actually don’t believe this, but it was said to me very recently. Friday and Saturday nights are still called date nights, not that one can’t have a date with oneself. But let’s get real, when you see someone siting in a restaurant or movie alone, don’t you wonder why they are alone and where their significant other is? Are they on their way? Did they have a fight? Why couldn’t that person have chosen to go out alone?

Have you ever tried to go to a concert alone? A movie? a 5-star restaurant?  A vacation? A play or musical? Just to name a few. How did it go?  Were you thinking the whole time about having someone next to you? Did you bring a book with you? Did you call someone so that you wouldn’t seem so alone? Were you texting the whole time?

There is a movement called Quirkyalone. Have you heard of it? I learned of this site many years ago after stumbling upon the book. It’s to celebrate the choice to be single but what I have noticed is that there are many ways for those quirkyalone folks to get together. Is this a way to celebrate or just another way to bridge that gap to “not” being alone?  Shoot, they have even started their own holiday!

Do not misunderstand – I am not knocking quirkyalone. I love the concept actually and think we should celebrate singlehood more. Just as I think we should celebrate those persons who CHOOSE not to have kids, instead of bashing them, making them feel like they aren’t a contributing member of society or a leper.  The point is really this – why do need to celebrate these differences from what is expected, or more specifically, what is believed to be the norm?

The norm seems to be this 2×2 world, with 2.2 kids, a white picket fence and all other trappings. If you are different than this, then you are different.  But why?  Do we need to label like this? Do we need to really follow social convention anymore?  Hasn’t the past taught us anything?  There is no ONE answer for the world, for people, for coupling. Or for being single.  Does it matter that you have been divorced twice? Or that you have never been married at 35? or even 45?  And for those that are married, why the convincing that it’s the best? Can’t we all agree that the grass is always greener so living happily in one’s own world instead of comparing is really the way to go?

Just a few thoughts I have been mulling lately with no real answers yet …